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Falling Haiku Leaf - September 2006

Gardening for Children - The Pizza Garden

September 27th 2006 06:35
Now that the warm weather has finally arrived, it’s time to get muddy and wet in the garden. It’s great to give children a little garden that they can be responsible for. What’s even better is one that they can harvest from and eat. Watching plants grow and making sure they are healthy can be a fun learning activity with a small cost outlay and a daily interest/job. With only a courtyard, The Pizza Garden is a potted garden we loved last year and are going to start again tomorrow.

The Pizza Garden

What you will need:-

5 pots – at least 40cm
2 Capsicum seedlings

2 Cherry Tomato seedlings
1 pot basil
2 x 30 litre potting mix
1 interested child

Tomatoes
Real winners with kids, cherry tomatoes are compact and quick to grow. They don’t need heavy staking – growing to about 35 – 50cm, but should have support with bamboo stakes, which can be used in pots. It generally takes about 4 weeks from planting established seedlings until flowering then another 2 weeks before the child can see their tomatoes start up. Best position is full sun, but afternoon sun works well. Harvest when fruit is ready throughout a growing period of up to 3 months.

Capsicums
Capsicums take longer to fruit and have a deeper root system than tomatoes, but a good 40cm pot should be fine. Ask your local nursery for a compact sweet variety. Planting established seedlings now should ensure full fruit by December. Use bamboo stakes to support fruiting stems. Harvest just before the fruit is ready to drop and leave on a window sill for a couple of days. Will fruit for at least 2 months.

Basil
Oh, oh, oh, it smells so good!!! Basil is an annual herb that tends to go to seed all too quickly. At the first sign of flowers, nip them off and your plant will last longer. Harvest every two weeks through a 3 – 4 month growth cycle.


Watering
Child – get the little gardener to stick their middle finger into the soil every morning to see how dry the soil is. Water every other day – or every day when there is a hot spell. Best watered in the morning.
Parent – Basil, tomatoes and capsicums need a fair deal of water. If you plant in the garden or in terracotta, water once the soil has lost moisture on the top. You can do this either lightly every morning or evening – when ever your child is more interested – or more heavily every second day, depending on the heat. With plastic pots, watering every third day is fine so long as you make sure the roots get a good soak. You may need to water every day when the temperature goes over 27°.

Feeding
Last year we used Thrive, a water soluble fertilizer. One provided spoon per 5 litres each week. Don't apply if it's a hot day.

Pests
Child – have your child check their plants at every water for caterpillars. For fans of Eric Carle, it may be hard to squish caterpillars. We carefully (my skin crawled) took the few caterpillars we found and gave them a new home. My gardenias are sturdy little plants. But we planted two of each fruit to ensure at least one made it through. Tomatoes and capsicums are susceptible to fruit fly, so be sure to remove ripe fruit. Pyrethrum or a simple home made garlic spray (1/2 fist of crushed garlic in water) work well instead of chemical sprays.

Post Script
Last year, Santa had a home made pizza left out for him.
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Mummy The Failed Romance Writer

September 25th 2006 15:27
Once upon a time, there was an impoverished Uni student, who tried writing romance for profit. Sadly, she was silly.

“Brittney Courtney Thingy–Ohm-Lau stood at the grave of her semi half step mother. Her innocent tears gave way to a flood of awakening. Standing beside her was the man she loved, the man she loathed…the man she wanted…”

With my hat off to K.L.Almeroth (http://www.orble.com/kl-almeroth/), writing Romance with a capital “R” isn’t as easy as it reads.

There are two kinds of Romance out there. The serious and the silly. Have you ever read a Mills & Boon? It’s kinda like inviting a 13 year old shut in to host a “My Little Pony” party in your brain. And remember, you’re her only friend.

M & B provide would-be romance writers with guidelines to help them on their way, with a brief summary of how to build a good story, tips on heroines, examples of successful plots, theme options, notes on peripheral characters and what makes a great love interest.

Even armed with this information, I couldn’t write Romance. First encounters with love interests soon degenerated into hard core porn. So did first encounters with peripherals. My heroine was so boring I wanted to give her heroin, if only to get her to have sex with peripherals. Sometimes with My Little Pony. I just couldn’t take it seriously.

But serious writers of Romance can produce beautiful stories. Take Jane Austen. Social commenter, yes. Wordsmith, certainly. The ultimate Romance writer – without a doubt. Her first master wasn’t one in an underground S&M den. It was Romance, a subject she took seriously.

For silly Romance, have a look at how three of her successors interpreted Romance as an agent for Passion – the Bronte sisters. Don’t you secretly feel that Emily Bronte’s Heathcliff and Catherine got up to a lot more on the moor? His cruelty, her strange sub/dom routine? The Bronte’s were an odd trio. Charlotte Bronte was openly critical of Jane Austen’s confined characters in what she saw as a controlled, manicured world. Meanwhile, her most loved character, little Jane Eyre, was subject to all sorts of lovingly controlled abusive mind games from Rochester, not to mention the torments of an emotional and dietary starved upbringing. Anne’s two novels were just as bleak. All too melodramatic, reeking of M&B, just with more adjectives and flapping about outside in the wind at midnight. All a bit silly really. Very well written, but silly. Best left in Monty Python Semaphore…

Perhaps a deeper appreciation of mature romance is why Austen is enjoying more popularity than ever, while Wuthering Heights is nowadays left in the realm of the adolescent reader. Perhaps we like Austen more because her characters knew when they were being silly
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Nursing Home Blues - Going into Grey Care

September 25th 2006 10:56
I’ve read a few pieces recently on how hard it is for parents on their child’s first day at day care or pre-school. The little one’s first big step away from you. Weepy mothers standing around as their child merrily runs off to play with little more that a “Bye mum!” You know they have to go, but at the end of the day, they will be back at home with exciting stories form the sandpit.

Over the past two weeks, I’ve helped my uncle prepare my aunt for grey care. Having suffered from Alzheimer’s disease for nearly a decade, my aunt has entered a nursing home.

The process was eerily similar. More than a year ago, we viewed a few places and had my aunt’s name on waiting lists. When we were finally told that a place was available, there was the same irrational, gnawing guilt but we knew that this decision was for the best. And we were happy that we managed to get a placement in the home we liked the best. The three of us visited the home together for orientation a few days before my aunt was admitted, talked to the nursing staff about her history and were briefed on the daily activities there. We sorted through her clothes, labelled them, along with “comfort items” so she wouldn’t fret at the change.

When the big day came, my aunt pottered around one of the recreation rooms while we filled out the paper work. Before we knew it, my aunt was happily walking up the hall, arm in arm with another resident.

In the car on the way home, my uncle calmly said to me “It’s a beautiful place. But I know she won’t be coming back.”
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Tired of The Wiggles? Can’t stand High Five? They Might Be Giants children’s album “No!” could be one for you.

Number One Son (3 & 1/2):- I like this music because it’s happy and fun and I can dance around to it. My favourite song is the one about the robots who march with flags that the children made for them (Robot Parade). My other favourite is the song that you clap and jump into the air to (Clap Your Hands). My little brother’s favourite song is the balloon song (Where Do They Make Balloons?) because my mum sings it to him and then he goes to sleep


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Shrek 2 Soundtrack & The Buzzcocks

September 15th 2006 12:49
The Buzzcocks were playing locally the other night – but the closest I could get to them was by watching Shrek 2.

The Sherk 2 soundtrack certainly knows its parent audience


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To the Minister for Education and Women’s Issues

Dear Madam


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Cooking Shows and Huey's Dirty Tea Towel

September 12th 2006 11:18
My husband is yelling at the TV again. This could mean one of two things. Either Shevchenko has missed on goal or Ian Hewitson is taking us off on another adventure into the Land of the Bland.

It’s Huey


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September 19th is Talk Like A Pirate day.

“Avast, me hearties, yea’ll be finding bootie ere the day be done!”
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Lies we tell our children.

When I was small, my parents told me that the Easter Show was only held in Sydney once every three years


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It’s National Poetry Week.

Haiku has become a favourite form of satirical expression in popular culture. Office Haiku, Pet Haiku and Drinking Haiku are just a few topics where the 575 abound


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2006 Jedi Census

September 4th 2006 17:45
2006 Jedi Head Count

In the 2001 Australian census, some 70,000 people declared their religion to be Jedi. For the 2006 Census, we joined the ranks


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Acceptable Porn

September 4th 2006 16:36
Acceptable Porn

Don’t get excited


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Steve Irwin and the Morbid Death Game

September 4th 2006 14:45
Crikey! It's sad but true, we’re awful people.

Each year for the past four years I’ve hosted a New Year’s Day recovery party. And each year the party favourite is the Morbid Death Guess


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